Solana Visits the Hospital

Solana: Well, doc, I think I did pretty well on my TPS. You may HODL my bag if you like.
Doctor: Well, under the circumstances, I'd rather not.
Solana: Eh?
Doctor: Mr. Sol, I'm afraid you are the rektest blockchains in the United States. You have everything.
Solana: You mean I have production outages?
Doctor: Yes.
Solana: Non functional dashboards?
Doctor: Yes.
Solana: Hysterical selling?
Doctor: Uh, a little bit, yes. You also have several bugs that have just been discovered -- in you.
Solana: I see. You sure you haven't just made thousands of mistakes?
Doctor: Uh, no, no, I'm afraid not.
Solana: This sounds like bad news.
Doctor: Well, you'd think so, but all of your bugs are in perfect balance. Uh, if you have a moment, I can explain.
Solana: Well ...
Doctor: Here's the door to Coinbase, see? And these are oversized bagholders. That's investors, that's adopters, and this cute little cuddle-bug is the founder, Anatoly. Here's what happens when they all try to send their SOL to Coinbase all at once. Woo-woo-woo-woo-woo-woo-woo! Move it, chowderhead! We call it, "Three Stooges Syndrome."
Solana: So what you're saying is, I'm indestructible!
Doctor: Oh, no, no, in fact, even slight whale could --
Solana: In-de-structible...

Comment:

The network is still offline and peeps cant send their SOL to dump! looka looka at these wonderful reddit comments

u/Cornpops23
3 hours ago
Access to Phantom Wallet
I can access my phantom wallet again, but every transaction keeps failing, as expected. But for anyone reading, you should be able to access your wallet again

u/Meneceo
3 hours ago
I stacked my SOL on Binance Earn, is it normal that I can’t take them back now?

u/Zealousideal_Box_544
2 hours ago
Don't see staked SOL in Phantom
I can now my SOL in Phantom but I don't see my staked SOLs as of now. Anyone having the same problem?

u/DaBestWriter
2 hours ago
How do i sell this sh*tcoin?
Almost all exchanges are not accepting transactions to avoid the potential rug pull that about to happen, how do I get out of this??

Comment:

Posted byu/therockmaniac
28 minutes ago
My goshhhh. I am holding 50 k usd worth of solana. What should I do now

Comment:

therockmaniac
27m
Is the server back up yet? I am pissing my pants every hour goes by.

Comment:

therockmaniac
17m
ANY GUESSES HOW MUCH LONGER THE SERVER TO GO BACK UP AGAIN???!?


User
DB84762
Calm down spud.

Comment:

Posted byu/Hopeful-Switch-4634
20 minutes ago
How to Sell SOL now?
Hello,

I'm trying to transfer SOL from my wallet to an exchange to sell, but it won't let me because Solana shut off the network. This is going to cost me a lot of money. I wanted to sell a few minutes ago at $163 and now the price is dropping. How can Solana help in this circumstance?

Comment:

mcjord
28m
They rolled out a patch a few hours ago, forced the validators to update, and it failed. They're currently forcing the validators to all update with a new patch again. We're at 14 hours and counting since the last block was validated. What a gong show.

Comment:

Adept-Guide-8327
2h
They still down?!?! Looks like the new running joke Isn't when ADA will get smart contracts but when SOL will come back up!